I’m in a bit of a bad way this week. Back is hurting horribly and the tiredness is eating away at me. The pain killers don’t take the pain away and the sleeping tablets don’t help me sleep.
I’m finding it hard to concetrate. Words swim in front of my eyes, so I apologise if I’m not at my best right now. But I’m not meaning to moan. In my mind I feel ridiculously positive. I’m absoloutely not going to let it swallow me up this time.
I keep thinking about all the amazing things I have in my life that are worth getting better for. The brilliant friends who always seem to shine through. The new opportunities and possibilities that life is always throwing my way. The Boy.
There is no doubt that it is “unfair” that I am in this situation – tucked up in my bed supported by 8 pillows, in pain, dopey and tired. But I really am learning that the way you think directly affects the way you feel. So instead of feeling sorry for myself, I’m thinking of all the lovely things that are ahead of me. Instead of being upset that it’s been this way for so long, I’m planning the baby steps I can take that will lead me back to being “normal”.
It feels great…like I’m taking the control back and filling my head with lots of my favourite things (Sound of Music styleee) Much nicer to be distracted by fabulous thoughts than be drowning in sad ones. Here are a few of todays rays of sunshine that are keeping me sane…would love to hear what makes you happy too!