It’s finally here! The day we have been hearing about for 8 years. The day that the world descends on an already overcrowded London and stops us going anywhere, ever. The day we finally get to see the opening ceremony, and all those farmyard animals (?!)
Today my friends, is the start of the Olympics. And yes, while we could all concentrate on the fact that traffic is going to be a nightmare, that we won’t be able to move on the tubes thanks to millions of tourists, that prices in London will soar over the next few weeks and that we’ve spent millions of pounds that we don’t have on things we probably won’t need for more than a few weeks…we need to forget all of that, and focus on the good stuff. And there IS good stuff. Lot’s of it!
Here’s our top ten (girlie) reasons to get into the Olympic spirit and fall in love with the greatest show on earth…
- It’s bringing us together as a nation. It’s been wonderful to see communities lining the pavements, cheering the Olympic torch on and supporting their local heroes. It also gave just about everyone in the UK an excuse to skive off work for an afternoon. Thank you, Olympics.
- Due to the huge crowds heading to Olympic Park, we’ve been advised to only travel when necessary. This means we all have a legitimate excuse to leave work early, or work from home. In our pyjamas. With rollers in our hair, if we so wish. That also means we get to spend our usual commuting time in bed. YAY for the Olympics!
- We have an amazing team of athletes and realistic hopes of a haul of medals. We also get to see a bunch of said athletes NAKED. Thank you, Louis Smith and Team GB boys. We are truly getting behind you all…(we wish!)
- We have an excuse to wear fancy dress everyday. Just think of the possibilities. Tennis Player. 70’s runner. Those odd little mascots. Any time, anywhere…and you probably won’t even get any funny looks in your local Tesco. All in the spirit of things, you see…
- The world will be watching, and talking about, our opening ceremony. While the exact performance has remained a well kept secret, some of the rumours around Danny Boyle’s plans have been confirmed. You remember China’s incredible spectacle, right? Well of course, Great Britain are going one better…and bringing in a truckload of farm animals. Yep – watch in glee as we show the world how it’s really done, with a few chickens and a goat…
- For the next few weeks at least…we have an excuse to drink champagne for breakfast. If we win a heat or medal…excuse. If we break a record? Excuse. If we lose horrendously? Definite excuse. None of the above? WE’RE HOSTING THE OLYMPICS IN OUR HOME TOWN! That’s all the excuse you need, my friends.
- We get to be patriotic and buy British. Make-up, that is. Go all out with Burberry, Rimmel, Illamasqua and co…find the perfect shade of red lipstick for you, or perhaps a flash of dark blue across the eye. And best of all? We get to experiment even more with our nail varnish! Union Jacks; Olympic Rings; Bronze, Silver and Gold…the options for nail-art are endless.
- We get to drive a plane down our street! It’s not every day we can say that, right? Olympic Sponsor BA (who haven’t banned you eating chips or anything…) have made this handy little tool that let’s you drive a jumbo jet down your road. I squealed when I saw my front door. Geeky? ME?!
- There is an absolute legitimate excuse for street parties and impromptu dancing, all over London. Bring out the bunting, bake those cupcakes, and have my permission to drink Gin out of a can…at any time of day. We’re being patriotic, Goddamit!
- We can use the experience to broaden our cultural horizons. There will be supporters from countries all over the world in town, and we should make the most of this opportunity to make them feel welcome. Talk to the visitors. Make friends. Learn about their home towns. This has ABSOLUTELY NOTHING to do with the fact you may be able to potentially possibly maybe go stay with your “new friends” in their lovely countries in future. NO. Not at all…
- The Olympics bring out our competitive nature…and we get the chance to scream louder than anyone else. The athletes have said that having the crowd behind them, hearing our voices cheering them on, will give them a real Home Advantage. Plus, we beat the French to host this thing. That gives us reason to gloat, non?
- For those of us who do still have to travel on the tubes at any point, it’s not all bad news. We get to listen to bumbling Boris the buffoon making the tube announcements throughout the Olympics. I love that
possibly drunkreassuring voice of his, telling me how crowded the tubes are going to be…while I have an armpit in my face and an elbow in my boob. It’s… comforting, somehow.
- The Athletes are inspiring our British Men to take a long, hard look at themselves and realise they may not actually have the body of a Greek God after all. After the Games, there could be at least 25% more fit, muscular men in London than usual, and you lucky single ladies will get to play with them. You have my permission.
- If sport isn’t actually your thing, and you can’t understand why people keep running round in a circle until they get tired, it’s fine. London has plenty of other activities lined up during the next few weeks. Why not get reacquainted with Shakespeare, check out the BMW car Art exhibition or visit the AMAZE installation at the London 2012 Festival?
- The Olympic rings. OK, we’r not allowed to talk abut them, draw them, have them in shop windows or in kids schools or on any products that aren’t “officially endorsed”…but it does give us a fine excuse to make childish jokes and innuendos about “rings”. Fun for all the family. Or at least those over 16…
- We are absolutely allowed to blare (and sing) slightly dubious power ballads in the name of “team spirit”. You are well within your rights to have “Eye of the Tiger” as your morning alarm call, or to sing “We are the Champions” on the bus. Hey, why not encourage everyone to join in, too? You won’t look at all weird, I promise.
- This is the perfect time to expand your mind. Perhaps a good place to start is genealogy? Get to know your ancestors better, learn about where they came from…then claim the right to change your heritage, depending on which country is winning the medals.
- It’s the perfect opportunity to raise money for charity. Why not arrange a bake sale at work, make some Olympic themed cakes, and sell them to all your colleagues. Or, you could blame the olympic lane for making it IMPOSSIBLE to get to the office, and eat them all yourself instead.
- The Olympics have finally forced TFL to install air conditioning on the tubes, for some lines at least. And for the the time being, we get wifi on the platforms too. Yay to being able to contact people while you’re underground! Amazing.
- Last but not least? Well. There will be an influx of foreign men on British soil. If you’ve run out of luck dating in London, why not mingle with the international muscle, and be the subject of someone’s holiday romance? This could be the year you bag a hunky American, or smooth Italian. Get out their ladies and show those boys just what us British ladies are made of!
So there you go. Don’t let yourself get down in the dumps over the coming weeks. The Olympics are GREAT. And there are 20 reasons to prove it.
And we may even win a truckload of medals too. Have a great few weeks out there – get behind Team GB…and head along to show your support when and if you can!
Good luck to everyone involved. We’re rooting for you. x
Happy Olympics, London.